My mother – the wedding-planning voice of reason (Part 1)


Since the moment Shaun and I got engaged (or…really, the moment I told my family that Shaun and I got engaged), my mother has been the voice of reason for all things wedding planning related.

When I get caught up in pretty details and ways to make our ceremony or reception “unique” or “different,” she reminds me of those little, logistical issues that might make my idea not work out so well. I really do appreciate that she’s playing this role. It keeps me from making potentially disastrous decisions (ok, maybe that’s an exaggeration). Sometimes, though, it’s just frustrating.

For instance, we’ve struggled with the concept of “favors” to give away at either the ceremony or reception. In my wedding-overwhelmed eyes, it’s another expense, and people usually don’t take them anyway. Mama Taco agrees with me on this point. That being said, she suggested we try to do something, even something little. (My suspicion is that this suggestion came from not wanting friends and family to whisper “Did you notice they didn’t have favors at the wedding? How dare they?” I digress.) So poking around for some relatively cheap but still fun favors, I came across this neat little idea and immediately loved it…

(Source, Source, Source)

Bubbles!  My thought was, we could give them away at the ceremony with the programs (like those pictured on the chairs above) and have people blow them at us as we walk back down the aisle as man and wife. We’re hopefully getting married outside, so we wouldn’t have to deal with issues like the bubbles not being allowed in church. I found bubbles online for fairly cheap and figured if we gave them away at the ceremony rather than the reception, we’d have to order less and they’d be a treat for those who actually came to see us get married. Another bonus! People here are notorious for attending the reception, but not the ceremony.

At first, Mama Taco liked the idea. I was finally in favor heaven. But upon revisiting this topic, it got a pretty swift veto, and I’m not going to lie…I was shocked for a little bit. I was really excited about the bubbles (obviously). What happened? Well, reasoned Mama Taco, the soap used to make bubbles will stain nice clothing if they happen to land on us, our party, or other guests. And let’s face it…the bubbles will land on people. That’s kind of the point. That’s a whole lot of nice fabric ruined for the sake of a cheap favor that we don’t hate. After a few minutes of sulking, I had to agree.

Which leaves us favor-less for the moment. We went back to the drawing board, thinking back to every family member or friend’s wedding in recent history. We honestly couldn’t come up with any favor that wasn’t food (we are already going to have too many sweets at the reception to give away candy, a universal favorite) or that people wouldn’t leave on the table.

My inclination at this point is to completely do without favors, no matter what anyone may think of that decision. Have you ever been to a wedding where guests didn’t receive favors? Did the guests think it was tacky?

(On a side note, there have been many instances of my mother’s sound reasoning and level-headedness so far in the wedding planning, so I’m going to continue relaying them. To put them all into one post would be way too long…so stick around for Part 2 in the near future! I promise that one’s a happier story, for me anyway.)


4 responses »

  1. I got at my cousin’s wedding last year (no clue what kind of expense they are) but these really cute coasters. then my friend’s sister had homemade jars of jam they had made. I highly doubt anyone would actually be mad at there not being favors. but those are some ideas i have seen if you haven’t thought of them… also going to another wedding on the 20th could let u know what they have there 😉

  2. Pingback: Logic and wedding planning – learning from Mom (part 2) « Wedding in the 920

  3. the wedding i just went to (and caught the bouquet…hint hint chris!) made homemade heart cookies and put 2 in little baggies and put a cute curled up ribbon on it. it was homemade but cute.

    • That’s a cute idea! I think it might work well for a smaller wedding…I really like baking but with a guest list that looks like it will top 300, that’s a LOT of cookies. 🙂 Congrats on catching the bouquet!

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