In the spirit of yesterday’s post about not getting wrapped up in frivolous details and focusing on what really matters – our relationship – Shaun and I took some pretty big steps as far as wedding maturity go this week.
Now, before I start this, remember that we’re planning a wedding in a rural area. We had 2 options – move it to nearby Green Bay and pay much more for all of our vendors, or try to keep it local and be limited in our vendor options. Since one of us is a broke law school student, we chose the second option. Thus, we booked a lot of our vendors without a specific wedding budget in mind. I know this wasn’t necessarily the smartest thing to to, but when there are only a handful of options available for everything, we had to act fast to make sure they weren’t taken – especially because we tended to gravitate towards the local vendors that offer a super quality product for the (low) price that you pay.
So we had a set of numbers for things that we’ve already committed to. Our wedding budget was born. We made a spreadsheet (Google Docs, how I love thee…) of all of the things we might possibly need for our wedding day, filled in the amount we already know and the deposits we have already paid, and made educated guesses on the rest. The result was shocking – but not in a bad way. Yes, the number was higher than is reasonable for a one day party. But it wasn’t unmanageable. We realized we’ve already done quite a bit so far, so as long as we don’t go insane in the “details,” (although that’s where I’ve heard the devil is…) we should be alright.
Because money is a scary thing for both of us (he’s never had any real debt and I’ve never known anything but debt in my adult life), we decided to open our very first joint bank account to start saving for the wedding. We’ll each contribute as much as we can, when we can and we’ll only pay for wedding things out of that fund. That way, we’ll know exactly what we’re spending money on and when. I don’t really know why, but setting up the bank account made our relationship and commitment feel even more real. It was one of the most exciting things I’ve done in a while.
And after all of that was done, we spent some much needed relaxing time just hanging out and enjoying each other’s company. I feel like we don’t get to do that as much as we did during the school year, even though we were doing the long-distance thing then. We see each other more now, but the time we spend is usually with our families and we don’t really have a space that’s just ours.
It was nice to forget about the wedding, forget about moving and job hunting and law school and just be together for a little bit. Those are the times when I know for sure that this is the person I want to share each day with for the rest of my life.