[Before I start, I’m going to say that I was a bit hesitant to publish this post in its entirety. I wrote it a few days ago when Shaun and I were about 3 days into a week-long argument and I thought that it might help me put what we were fighting about into perspective. Well, it did. That particular argument is finally resolved. While the opening of the post may not be how I’m feeling right now anymore, I think the general principle still sticks and is worth reading, plus I think it would be a shame to let this fabulous list of Shaun’s awesomeness go to waste.]
After writing Thursday’s post about my grandparent’s 50 years of marriage, I started thinking even more about something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. Sometimes in a marriage (or an engagement), things aren’t happy. Sometimes we argue, we get frustrated, we cry. Sometimes there’s an issue that seems like it will never be resolved. But what keeps a long-term relationship working is knowing that those times don’t last forever, the problem will be resolved, and we’ll be a better couple for it. Our love will evolve, but it will take work.
Don’t take this post the wrong way – Shaun and I are fine. There are some things that are stressing us both out right now and it makes us both more snippy (especially with each other) than usual, but we’re fine. We’ll get over it, eventually. Overall, we’re happy. There are just some things we don’t see eye to eye on that seem to keep coming up lately.
When we find ourselves in rough times, having the same argument over and over, I try to take a step back and think about why we’re doing this. Why we’ve decided to commit ourselves to each other for the rest of our lives. Why we’re going through this whole crazy wedding process to get to the end result…a marriage.
It’s love. Even when I’m mad at him, I love Shaun with all of my heart and don’t want to live the rest of my life without him. So to help me get over my snippiness, I put together this little list to remind myself why I chose Shaun to be my life partner…even when he’s driving me crazy.
7 Things I Love about Shaun:
He’s Kind: Seriously. He’s probably the nicest person I know. He tells it like it is, sure. But he would never intentionally hurt anyone. Ever. And that extends to animals as well. I respect that.
He Likes Me the way I Am: Not quite the lyric from an Ingrid Michaelson song, but the sentiment is the same. I have flaws, but he chose me anyway. I have a temper, I can be way too emotional, I get worked up over pretty stupid things…and yet he’s still here. He still wants to be my husband.
He’s Genuine: What you see is what you get. Sure, he’s a little bit country. But with that comes the hard work, the honesty and the respect for family and friends that come with being raised that way.
He’s Not Afraid to be Himself: Shaun is proud of who he is and what’ he’s accomplished. A lot of days, I wish I could be as confident in myself as he is in himself. He knows what he loves to do and does it. He doesn’t care if other people think badly of him (which they usually don’t) and he doesn’t sweat petty gossip. Most boys do this better than most girls, I think, but I admire him for it anyway.
He Surprises Me: When we started dating again, it floored me how much Shaun had changed in subtle, but big ways. He spoke Spanish (from years of working on the farm). He dressed in polos and button up shirts (from years in the single bar scene). Every once in a while he still says or does something that completely knocks me off of my feet…in a good way.
He’s Great: Read this one as though you were reading a fortune cookie. Enough said.
He Loves Me: I think this one is most important of all, but its the easiest to forget. When we’re mid fight and can’t get past whatever stupid thing we’re arguing about now, I sometimes lose track of the love that I know he has for me. I think because my feelings are hurt or because we’re not speaking for a little while that he doesn’t love me anymore. He tells me (rightfully so, I’ll admit) that I take little things way too personally sometimes, but I think it boils down to a fear that one day my luck thus far will dry up and he won’t love me anymore. I know that isn’t true…because I know that could never happen to my feelings towards him.