Deal Breaker


Money, religion, politics. The three topics I’ve been told you shouldn’t discuss over dinner. I’m quickly learning just how difficult it can be to talk about them at all.

In case you haven’t heard, Wisconsin is in a bit of a political frenzy right now (read about it here). As a left-leaning girl living in Madison, the capital of the state and the heart of the debate, being engaged to a right-leaning farm boy from the Northeast is taking its toll on our relationship the last few days. Since the budget bill is all that anyone seems to be talking about (with good reason), we too have tried discussing the issues at hand. It almost always ends in a fight. Usually with tears (from me, not him). It’s made for an interesting week, to say the least.

It doesn’t help that we’re about two and a half hours apart, and only see each other about once a week. But the added tension of opposing political views over such a nationally spotlighted issue right now has certainly made us step back and think about what’s really important in our relationship. And as strongly as I feel about this bill, what’s important to our relationship is not collective bargaining rights or public employee benefits. Sometimes, Shaun and I are going to have to agree to disagree. We love each other, this too shall pass, and we’ll work everything out.

There was a time when fundamentally different political views might have been a deal breaker for me. I guess that’s still true to an extent, but not for something as relatively superficial as Democrat versus Republican. I wouldn’t, for instance, marry a neo-Nazi. I know that at the end of the day Shaun and I are both good people, albeit ones with slightly different views about how the state should be run. I can live with that, I guess.


About Kimberly H.

I'm a Wisconsin girl born and bred - a 2L at the University of Wisconsin Law School and a former member of the UW Marching Band. I married my best friend on 7/7/2012 and am an avid lover of nail polish, corgi pups and historical fiction novels!

2 responses »

  1. sorry to be commenting again BUT from a left-leaning girl living with a right-leaning boy, I can see what you mean. Chris and I talk about whats going on all the time, and we both have things we stand fast on, and things we agree on. Its all about being able to have calm conversations where you state your opinion but listen to what the other has to say. In the end, politics are like religion – you believe what you believe and you can’t really change too much about it unless YOU want to, not because someone else wants you to.

  2. Completely agree! It was a stressful couple of days until we figured out the “right” way to talk about politics – without getting into a fight about it. And I love your comments, I don’t mind at all! 🙂

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